usually, when i come home from work between 11 pm and midnight, i find my roomate lexy on the couch, cuddled up with her cats, watching TV. i have come to expect this, and it is somewhat comforting.
so, imagine my shock, when i open the door to a strange odor and muffled laughter...and see lexy, snuggling with a half-naked guy i've never seen before, while silmeltaneously realizing the illegal source of the distinctive odor.
"hi!" we all say, me, with false, high-pitched, awkward cheer, and them, with drunken joy. "we're drunk!" lexy announes happily, her fingers intertwined with skinny, pale, shirtless boy. you don't say!
"this is my friend, tony!" she shares, and we exchange pleasantries before i walk/jog towards my room as quickly as is polite.
i snatch the package my mom sent me today off the table, sit it on my bed, and happily rip off the wrapping. it's chock full of my christmas decor from home. i've been waiting for it so i could decorate my miniature charlie brown christmas tree. i guess that'll have to wait for another night.
"i think your cats like me," i can hear shirtless stranger say as i shut the door. i'm sure they do, tony. i'm sure they do.
***disclaimer***
any simularity between this short story and any actual people or events is entirely coincidental. if "lexy" asks you if i wrote this and published it online, the answer is obviously no. in fact, this whole thing never even happened.
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